For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been super independent. There are two types of people in life when it comes to relationships. Those who are happy to and can live without them & those who couldn’t bare the thought of being single. I’m definitely the former with a lot of people in my life being the latter. So today I thought I’d give my opinion on why it’s good to be single.
So before we start, just a little backstory on my relationship timeline. I’ve spent most of my life single (how depressing does that sound) but as you read on, you’ll soon discover a theme of me quite enjoying that. I started dating guys at the age of about 18-20 but nothing too serious came of it. Then came a period of me having what I would call ‘actual boyfriends‘ when finally, that came to an end in April of last year. Since then I’ve been single. Shortly after the break up I was so adamant to find another boyfriend. So desperate to be with someone and the thought for failing at the relationship was a real burden on my heart. Quickly though, I picked myself up and realised it’s good to be single.
// Independence \\
I’ve seen far too many people lose their independence when in a relationship. Slowly but surely the relationship takes over their lives, takes over their independence and sooner or later, they can’t do anything without their partner. Even if you’ve been in a relationship for 30+ years, married with kids, it’s still so important to keep that independence.
Being single forces independence upon you. You have no other choice but to do things for yourself, do things by yourself and to rely on nobody but yourself. This is such a vital skill to have in life and trust me, it’ll carry you through some of the toughest times. How many times did I just say independence?
// Lessons Learnt \\
Sooooooo many lessons are learnt when you’re single. General life lessons, skills and most importantly, lessons about yourself. When you’re single, you learn so much about yourself, you spend a lot of time alone (not in a sad way, in a good one) and you really come to terms with who you are. A lot of people hate their own company which I find a really sad thing but being single, forces you into it.
I genuinely think, hadn’t I been single, I wouldn’t be as strong or wise as I am today. Look after number 1, let yourself grow and learn… then look for the next relationship.
This is the big one, the one that I’m going to try not to get too OTT about. But friendships. So many friendships are lost due to relationships and so many friendships thrive when you’re single. Don’t get me wrong, I fully appreciate just how much time relationships take up, they’re practically a full time job. Unfortunately, I’ve been witness to too many failed friendships due to a relationship. People can’t seem to manage the two. I’ve been on the receiving end of a fizzled out friendships, actually multiple times. I like to class myself as a good friend and kept going back when the relationships failed but there is only so much one can take.
Being single has meant I’ve met some incredible people, I’ve grown some of the strongest friendships and with people I wouldn’t have met otherwise. Truth be told, my past relationships haven’t worked out because of how much I put my friends first and if someone can’t handle that, then they’re not for me. Please, don’t lose your friendships because of a boyfriend/girlfriend… it’s not worth it.
Relationships are amazing. They’re fun, they’re loving and who doesn’t want someone to Netflix & chill with on a weekend, have someone to love and someone be your number 1 support system? But so is being single. Right now in my life, I could, hand on my heart say “I’m happily single”. That’s not to say I wouldn’t be open to a relationship (and hot guys out there want to get in touch? slide into my DM’s) but for now, the single life is treating me well.
| Harrison |